Maybe

Maybe if I post what I eat everyday I will be held accountable. Maybe if I make myself look at it all I won’t cheat..

5/21/12 - I did GOOD!

Started day with 1200 calories…

Breakfast:

2 scrambled eggs - 140

1/2 Granny Smith apple - 41

Lunch:

Fresh & Easy Chicken Caesar Salad - 380

Dinner:

Mini Half & Half from Flame Broiler - 378

1 tbsp Magic Sauce - 60

Snacks:

Otter Pops - 25

Organic baby carrots - 70

Strawberries - 50

One chocolate coin - 29

Water:

2 liters

Ended day with 27 calories!

Gross

Have you ever felt like you’ll never be happy with yourself? I looked in the mirror this morning and saw a girl I don’t know. I saw a girl that is disgustingly obese. I’m 60lbs overweight and I feel like it’s only going to get worse.
My doctor diagnosed me pre-diabetic. She said I’m not too far from being a diabetic. I don’t want to deal with that. Especially knowing I caused it.
I hate shopping and I hate when people look at me. I don’t know what my boyfriend sees. I can’t believe he isn’t grossed out by the sight of me. Sometimes, I hate when he wraps his arms around me because I know what he’s feeling.
There has got to be an easier way to do this. I want it and I know what I have to do, but I need it to be easier.

Tired.

I’m tired of being the fat one. All of my cousins are skinny. ):

Day 29

Your definition of beauty.

- It’s on the inside. I think if you think beauty is only skin deep then you need a reality check.